The quest is over…

All these years you’ve been wondering what the world’s worst aluminium salesman looks like and finally you’ve found him. (I’m the one on the right.)

Fortunately I gave up selling aluminium* and became a  novelist and B2B/B2C copywriter.

I write copy, content, blogs, ghosted articles, case studies, eBooks and just about anything with words that is legal. When I’m not doing that I write novels, plays and radio drama.

Take a look around and get in touch if there is a project we could work together on.

(And if you are looking for aluminium, you’ve come to the right place. I’ve got a garage-full.)

* Fired








The Great Secret of Writing for Business in 96  Words

All business communication is a form of advocacy.

You want the reader to do or feel or think or want something. 

But you can’t tell them your message.

Because they won’t listen.

Or care.

And they will resist.

You have to smuggle the message into their heart using a Trojan Horse.

That way they think they came up with the idea themselves.

The Trojan Horse is called storytelling.

For a more detail explanation on how it works, read this article I originally published on Medium.

The Secret of Copywriting as Discovered 3,000 Years Ago by Homer.


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A bit more about me…

I started out at FCO of London as a junior writer. FCO was a legendary hot-shot creative agency that was winning awards all over the place. Then someone noticed. The agency was bought out and the handful of twenty-something creative mavericks turned overnight into millionaires. This signalled a change in creative direction. The whole agency went to lunch and never came back. I ended up in Singapore.

Here I worked on the prestigious Singapore Airlines account and also wrote ads for the former headhunting tribes of Borneo. (For more information about them, see the Tintin story, The Adventure of Flight 714.)

They turned out to be some of the most civilised clients I had ever encountered. It was the only time in my career that I had to wear a jacket and tie to meet the client.

And, indeed, the only time I had the pleasure of dancing the Ngajat with his daughter.

We danced until dawn beneath a chandelier of shrunken heads – relics of former copywriters who had ignored the dress code.

Around the year 2000 I published my first novel and became an ad freelancer, working mostly for the Ogilvy & Mather network, in particular as the unofficial creative Consigliere for Tham Khai Meng, the global creative chief at Ogilvy.

No need to read this, it’s pure self-indulgence

Frank Zappa once said you can’t be a real country unless you have a beer, an airline and a football team. Singapore doesn’t really have a national football team but it does have its own  Madonna. This is her – her image dominates Singapore. Working on the account was like being an altar boy and was a rite of passage for any creatives passing through Singapore. They never used actresses, just real flight attendants. This is Winnie. I guess there’s a hashtag against ads like this these days.

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